Search results for '"people drop by"'

People Drop By From Time To Time… Part 5

30 Nov

The Granny Cart kitchen has been quiet, posting has been light, but that doesn’t mean people have stopped dropping by.

Lower Manhattan From The Promenade

Oh no. the human is a curious animal.

For a while I was confused why my favorite tomato bisque recipe was getting so much traffic, then I realized it’s because the recipe name includes the year it was created, 1907, and people are searching for what people ate 100 years ago. I think that’s cool.

Slightly less predictable was the rapid up-tick in people searching for pickled egg recipes just before Thanksgiving. I mean… To whom doesn’t a vinegary, purple egg simply scream harvest festival?

Jeff Koons Blue Diamond, Christie's, New York

And how do I know all this? Because the good people at WordPress, the platform upon which the Granny Cart floats blissfully through the universe of the internets, are kind enough to allow us users to see the phrases; often funny, sometimes scary, but always interesting, that drive people to our blogs.

There are lots of queries about farro, couscous and pickles, a few about boar roasts, many about poultry, and a goodly number looking for cheesemaking hints. There’s the accent crew too, looking for recipes for Spätzle, Čevapčići and Coq a la Bière. But the grand majority of the inquisitive folk that end up on the Granny Cart probably don’t want to be here.

Bridge, Prospect Park

I hope the person that was looking for Vermont “Olive Oil” finally found what he was after, because the information was certainly not contained on this here Website.

To the gentleman who put curry on his curry, while I agree that the situation might in fact be a pressing one, I really don’t feel that it’s that big of a predicament. In fact, I bet it was quite tasty in the end!

I hope the person that wanted a “recipe containing macaroni and cheese” found one. (If not there’s one right here if you’re still looking, and it’s called Mac & Cheese).

Finally, I will end my commentary on the state of search queries in the same way as always by appealing to the people searching for “tiny bunnies that don’t grow.” Have you found them? Do they really exist? Please, if you’ve managed to find the world’s most perfect pet, contact me. I’ll be waiting.

Rip Van Winkle Bridge from the grounds at Olana

The Cute

cats that look like gernot (Kind of makes you wonder who Gernot is, doesn’t it?)

give a pig a pickle (That’s gotta be pretty amusing)

how to get a live chicken in a bottle (I bet it’s nowhere near as easy as getting a ship in a bottle)

Cauliflower poodles (Ah yes, behold, there on the horizon, the noble, cruciferous hound)

cute hard boiled eggs (I think these would make this person very, very happy)

Hudson-Athen Lighthouse, Hudson River

The Curious

sunshine scientific names (I’ve never wondered about sunshine before… But if clouds have names… And precipitation has names…)

onion and cheese mexican joke (So a queso and a cebolla walk into a cantina…)

everything is pickled people are pickles (Sounds like the start of someone’s manifesto, if you ask me. That reminds me, I’ve been meaning to write one of those…)

will God allow me to eat shrimp (Oh dear. I think there’s only one person that can really help you make that call, and it’s not me)

rabbits eat pickles? (If pigs can…)

Dumbo Warerhouse

The Creepy

what to do with wife that doesn’t make dinner (Might I suggest a two prong approach: 1. Become friendly with a restaurant that will deliver and 2. Learn how to cook for yourself, perhaps?)

Round-the-World Cookbook cannibal recipe (I’m sure this exists, and yet…)

I’ll give you my antidote To the venom, (But…?)

june cleaver tablescape (I think tablescapes were a little before the Beaver’s time, and yet simply imagining this sends shivers down my spine)

delete granny’s pet,now! (Oh dear, must have been old Gernot again)

Gowanus Canal

And finally, I would like to leave you with one of the truer statements I’ve ever encountered.

small is beautiful but not for cheese

Sir, you, me and Isaac must be seperated at birth. You are welcome here anytime. Please, take a seat, make yourself comfortable, oh, and don’t forget the cheese!

Have a happy weekend everyone!

People Drop By From Time To Time… Part 4

5 Apr

Why must we constantly ask why?

Do you think old Rover sits there asking himself, “Hmm… I wonder if there’s a surgery that will give me an opposable thumb… If only I had an opposable thumb, I could ask Google.” Is tiny Tweetie actually asking herself “do woodchucks like to eat peanuts yes or no” while she’s fluttering about her cage?

Swoon

No, I don’t think so. The need to know is a purely human trait, which has been made all the more intense since Al Gore invented the Internet. (Oh wait, you mean he didn’t? Oops.)

WordPress, the free service on which this blog runs, just keeps getting better and better, but hands down their best feature is the ability to see the funny phrases that bring people to The Granny Cart.

Lately, there’s been lots of Pickled Beet Egg queries (which makes sense). However, more often than not, I have to wonder about my skills as a writer.

Christmas Dachshund

What phrase did I use that made someone think I would know what a chicken lobster is?

I hope the person that wanted a “recipe containing macaroni and cheese” found one. (It’s right here if you’re still looking, and it’s called Mac & Cheese).

And to the person that searched for “tiny bunnies that don’t grow,” I’m still waiting to hear from you. Please let me know if you’ve found the impossible dream!

And so without further interruption, let the questions begin.

Colorful Brownstones

Just Get Dinner On The Table.

why did they make red beet eggs? (Because they’re crazy delicious!)

pickled beet salad with marshmallows (No. I do not recommend this. Not at all. Bad idea.)

how to butcher buffalo (I’d think this is the sort of thing one would like to know before one has a dead buffalo on one’s hands)

cooking on tugboats (I bet the kitchens are TINY)

if you just had breakfast all the time (I bet you’d get tired of pancakes)

Gramercy Park Giraffes

ELECTRIC CHICKEN TO POACH EGGS (But this would help with eating breakfast all the time)

i like chickens cuz they’are so delicious (Don’t we all… Don’t we all)

chicken vending machine (This would certainly make the guy above happy)

just put the lobster live in the oven (And people think hearing them “scream” is uncomfortable. Can you imagine listening to them scramble about in your oven? *shiver)

paparazzi recipe bean pasta soup (If my one viewing of Dirt taught me anything, it’s that this soup would probably taste like vodka, sweat and cigarettes)

vermont “olive oil” (Completely, and utterly, stumped by this one)

AH LA LA I FIGURED OUT I CAN’T MAKE DESSERT (That’s why god invented pastry shops, dear)

ill be eating dinner watching you die (creepy)

Smokestack

Things That Make You Go, Hmm…

what are german immigrants (Something tells me they’re from Germany)

where did borscht come from? (A magical rose-tinted world)

do giraffes eat juniper? (A more important question; Do they have juniper in Africa?)

morels growing in hair (Yes, that does sound like a problem)

last weekend chick very hot (No location, no name. Good luck with that buddy)

“sandra lee” +fervor (One word. No.)

Coney Island in Winter

“Sandra Lee” evil hatred (One word. Yes.)

ugly pictures of lime juice (Huh?)

Bridesmaid was a chicken (I certainly hope they don’t mean literally)

alliteration in root cellar (Yes, in my root cellar we only store; Parsnips, Pippins, Potatoes and Parsley Roots)

train dog not to eat chickens (I’d suggest something along the lines of a fence)

Ah, Bay Ridge

And finally, I know there’s actually some truth to this query, but it just makes me break into song:

how much is a pony in a cocktail.

Happy Spring everyone!

People Drop By From Time To Time… Part 3

14 Nov

The human being is a curious beast, always asking questions, looking for answers, trying to explain the strange things that occur in the world. WordPress is a free service with lots of great features, but hands down my favorite feature is the ability to see the search terms people used to find my site.

Pickled Beet Red Eggs

Sometimes they’re legit. I love seeing people get here because their chili is too spicy. They’ve come to the right place, I’ve got that. But the numerous people getting here because their goats have bloating. Well, no, you’ve come to the wrong place… And to the person that knows where to find the tiny bunnies that don’t grow, I’m still waiting. Please contact me asap!

And now, without further ado, I present to you the weird and wonderful world of search queries, food only for once, chez Granny Cart.

Fresh Mozzarella

Culinary Curiosities.

Find voluptuous veggies (hmmm)

hot dog grilling gizmo (you mean this?)

garlic magical elixir (I concur)

snob salad (sounds like my alumni association cocktail parties)

Strawberries

amazing vending machine (where? WHERE?)

what is chicken lobster (I don’t know, why don’t you tell us…)

potato flecks making machine (I bet if 3-2-1 Contact was still around they’d know where to find one)

recipes that require LOTS of blueberries (I guess we know who the thieves are now!)

I put curry on my curry (now that does sound like a predicament!)

Almonds

can you eat air potoatoes? (shouldn’t the question have been, what are air potatoes?)

And finally my two favorites.

mens primal instincts cooking dinner (they have those?! just kidding)

And.

They’ve come for the cheese sandwiches. (OH GOD NO!!!!)

People Drop By From Time To Time… Part 2

7 Aug

People are funny… They search for the strangest things, and sometimes in their searching they make it here to my humble little blog. Sometimes the terms they use to get here make me wish they had never stopped by, but other times, they make me laugh my little patookis off.

I decided its been a long time since we last checked in with the interweb searchings that lead folk to the Granny Cart… So without further ado I present to you…

Curious Cooking Queries.

a simple explanation of making cheese (well, yes, I think we’d all enjoy that!)

leech my beet (shiver)

our ham comes from chicken sign

chicken soup sick -soul (those stupid books really have fouled up simple recipe searches)

cucumber and gin soup (yes, please!)

show me all croatian food recipes

roast a whole hog with sauerkraut stuffing (nummy)

recipe containing macaroni and cheese (hmm… I wonder…)

chicken lobster (hmmm… actually, I don’t quite know what I think of this one…)

jumping squid salad (no, thank you, I’ll pass)

boys should not cook (sometimes I agree, sometimes I don’t)

pasta ending in i (actually, wouldn’t this query work better as “pasta that doesn’t end in i?)

Ah, The Barnyard.

mind reading chicken (this scares me a bit)

recipes for stopping bloating on goats

chicken crosswalk signs (lol)

homemade poison to kill woodchucks (if anyone actually has this, my mother would love you forever!)

raw goat milk sinus infection

hard bunnies (this also scares me)

The Funny, The Famous & The Frightening.

creative clevage (for some reason I can’t help but think this had something to do with Giada DeLaurentis)

between oven space and counter (in my kitchen, not much)

alton brown inflated ego (hehehehehehe)

chicken snack imagination lady (wha?)

homemade walk in cooler (yes please!)

granny goose tortillas (wha?)

can dalmatian puppy eat butter and bread (I see no reason why not)

“chez panisse” +”steve jobs” (I guess even he has to eat)

poem about food in a pantry (I bet that’s a pretty cute poem)
As usual, the photos have absolutely nothing to do with this post. They’re from our recent trip up to the Adirondacks. Pretty isn’t it? More to come on the trip (and most importantly the food) at a later date.

People Drop By From Time To Time…

25 May

One of the fun features about the wordpress blogs (I’ve never used any other service so I don’t know if this is a common feature) is that they show you the search terms by which people arrived at your site.

Sometimes, they make sense, like when someone gets here by searching for “pollo mole verde.” But, one person also made it to that posting with this search term: “sandra lee” topless.

The name of my blog also seems to cause some strange dropins. Actually, they might be totally legit but the algorithims by which search engines operate cause people to string along some words that, in their minds probably make perfect sense, but since it’s my mind reading these terms, they become funny.

A few examples you say? Why, how could I deny you this joy…

my horses name is Granny

granny addiction

granny rides boy in park

cart like the old folks use to carry

ruby granny bang

And then there’s just a plethora of funny chicken searches. (Why are chickens so funny? And I thought the duck was the funniest animal…)

owning one chicken

picture of a chicken braid

Pictures of pheasant and chicken crosses

bovine chickens

chicken getting hit by car picture

purple chicken

sophisticated chicken picnic

(this is one of my favorites, can’t you just picture a bunch of chickens sitting around having a lovely picnic? One rooster says to another “Well, I say Nigel, but, do you think Esmerelda is fluffing her feathers a wee bit, wantonly?” oh man, this just cracks me up!)

Apparenly my posts can be a bit confusing too. I think (or at least I hope) this post Sausages And Sparrows lead to this term: cooking sparrows.

And well, we’re back at the Pollo for this term which, well, yeah, it kinda suits me to a tee: lazy chef requires rice cooker. Yep, that’s me!

There’s also the terms that come through that are, well, a little blue, and well, really make me wonder about my style of writing. Seriously, all these words exist somewhere on my site? Eep!!

i was topless with my boyfriend

lovely virgin teeny

search.arabia.msn.com/results.aspx?q=fatty%20ass%20granny

sexy meal girl cut meat pictures

I hope I didn’t actually write any of those phrases!

And now finally, I’m going to leave you and head off into this goregous Memorial Day weekend with a lovely term. It’s a dream of mine to someday find one of these. Maybe, if they were really tiny, I could have one of these in my apartment:

tiny bunnies that don’t grow for sale

Yes people. Tiny bunnies. That don’t grow. That you can buy. Seriously person-that-searched-for-this-term… If you find these magical bunnies… PLEASE email me!!

Happy summer ya’ll!

By the way, the pictures have nothing to do with the post. They’re from our four hour tour of Vienna. They have cool signs in Vienna (I love the crosswalk one, the guy’s wearing a hat!). And this one over to the left? That’s a print I wish I could have bought, but, seeing as it was Sunday, the shop was closed. *sigh*